Sunday, April 17, 2011

High Risk Tango Stocks


Tango-Beat News Release:
High Risk Tango Stocks Crash

I would like you to be your own consumer advocate for what has become a hightly unregulated industry:  Tango.

People are buying High Risk Stocks in risky tango ventures -- thinking that social tango needs the whole floor to oneself as others enjoy watching you.  Commodity Funds in a bag full of steps and combinations.  Mutual Funds with fund managers (teachers) who have a large management fees but with a fund that usually has few dividends in making people feel good about themselves.  I recommend  Bonds:  Bond with the person in front of you and dance with their soul.  Make the tango walk the most important thing you do, and turns will start happening just so you don't bump into your friends, with whom you have also bonded.

First of all, we need to have a way to measure the risk of your investiment by knowing your Mutual Fund Manager, that is, your tango teacher.  We all want quality Mutual Fund Managers in our tango community, but unfortunately some have AUTISM, and you may not even know it!

Never heard of AUTISM?  It's the American Unqualified Tango Instructor's Society Membership.  No one is perfect but you don't want any teacher who has too many qualities for full membership.  My admittedly sarcastic litmus test for AUTISM teachers follows, but I promise at the end to present the solution.  It is remarkable, and NOT my idea.  Also, you will find NOT ONE item below that has anything to do with what you previously might have thought as being as "unqualified" -- such as "lack of experience."

How does your teacher score for AUTISM?   (5 is "very much so" and 0 is "not at all".)  There are eight items. Forty points means full membership and your Tango Mutual Fund is on it's way to being just paper receipts without any value (you give up dancing and your investment was poorly spent time and money).

The AUTISM litmus Test:
  • First and above all:  Make money.  Lots of it.  If someone wants to learn a volcada in a private lesson, don't suggest they need to learn to walk first.  Focus on what they want and it will cost them $560 at minimum to get that volcada, and then they might realize they cannot walk.  Now there is more money to be made!  [5= "very true of my teacher" and 0= "not at all true."]

  • Focus on technique and the science of tango not on the art of tango, after all tango, art and even holding a person's hand are all about technique and have nothing to do with heart-felt connection, right?

  • Focus on making wanna-be stage dancers.  When they finally look good they will feel good not so much about dancing but especially about how they are making money as teachers too!|

  • Criticize lack of talent and slow learners -- their own internal critic will make you feel just like the parent who couldn't be pleased.  Some will stay in your classes because they are used to criticism from their critical parents.  It feel like home to some students!

  • Make sure that everyone knows that your way is the right way/the only way.  Only through you can they know the Way, the Truth, the Light.

  • Use every opportunity to make tango your business (teaching on the dance floor) or doing an exhibition on the social dance floor among social dancers to demonstrate at every opportunity your awesomeness.

  • Make the assumption that being able to dance means being able to teach.  My motto is:  "Isn't that obvious that my greatness touches every aspect of anything I try?"

  • Give them a fish (not a fishing pole)!  Every legitimate tango move must come from some book or secret connection with a particular barrio in Buenos Aires.  No legitimate move could just spontaneously come from the music or the wonderful connection with a partner.  It comes from the Holy Book of Tango Steps, which is written in Hebrew.  You need a priest to translate it into English for you at the reasonable rate of $90 an hour.
There are so many wonderful teachers out there.  Look for one the way a great athlete does -- one that has results, and let those results be in making you feel good about yourself as a social dancer.

Where are these great teachers?  They are out there.  Some are professional and full-time teachers.  But others are just teaching for fun.  YOU are one of them.  Go to prácticas and help beginners, but start with some qualification like, "I am just one person, and each person has their own way."  Or, "This is just how understand what tango is."  Good teachers being omni-present in the tango community is not my idea.  Clay from Portland writes this (I give the link below the quote):

Teachers. The next tricky question [about community building] is who should teach? The answer is...you, along with everyone of your friends, neighbors, and acquaintances that knows the least thing at all about tango! I know this is contrary to everything you've heard and thought about tango, but tango is a folk dance and should be shared and taught by everyone. That's the way it originated, and that's the way it will promulgate. This is not rocket surgery, my friend, and the idea is to have fun and enjoy. Remember, everyone of those people that your neighbor, relative, and clumsy former student starts teaching is one more body brought into the tango community—and probably a body that would never have been there otherwise. Furthermore, once they see you dance and hear what a superior teacher you are, they will all end up as your student anyway.

Please go to his link on community building:  http://www.claysdancestudio.com/building_community.shtml
He also has a general page with many resources:  http://www.claysdancestudio.com/what_clay_says.shtml

Final Note:  My intent is NOT against good professional teachers.  It's all about BONDS -- connecting to others through tango as a social dance.  Sure, I love the visual effects of professional stage tango dancers, but I often just leave the room and rest at festivals during "show time."  It is truly all about BONDS and not HIGH RISK STOCKS.  Professional teachers are my among my coaches, guides and even my friends.  Find a great professional teacher!  But also learn from every soul who assents to dance with your soul.  That is where you will learn the most about tango.


1 comment:

Sara said...

American Unqualified Tango Instructor's Society Membership
lmao